Notes
- Leskie and Myself
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Comments
Programming is like sex: one mistake and you have to support it for the rest of your life.
Gift Cards on 29th July 2010 @ 6:47pm
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
Stop Smoking on 29th July 2010 @ 7:24pm
I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
Forex Trading on 29th July 2010 @ 9:39pm
The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.
Home Security Systems on 29th July 2010 @ 10:06pm
Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
New Balance Shoes on 29th July 2010 @ 10:31pm
Subtlety is the art of saying what you think and getting out of the way before it is understood.
Acai on 30th July 2010 @ 8:35am
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Propecia on 30th July 2010 @ 3:25pm
To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
make up games on 30th July 2010 @ 3:34pm
You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
Driving shoes on 30th July 2010 @ 5:57pm
It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion.
HGH on 30th July 2010 @ 6:52pm
The trouble with the Internet is that it's replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
spongebob games on 30th July 2010 @ 7:14pm
You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
DC Shoes on 30th July 2010 @ 10:39pm
Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.
Runner Rug on 30th July 2010 @ 11:56pm
Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
Bath Rug on 31st July 2010 @ 3:22am
A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
Tramadol drug on 31st July 2010 @ 4:17am
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
Tramadol on 31st July 2010 @ 5:00am
Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
Dirt Devil on 31st July 2010 @ 10:14am
Democracy is where you can say what you think even if you don't think.
uggs on 31st July 2010 @ 10:49am
There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
Electrolux on 31st July 2010 @ 9:26pm
Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains.
Vacuum Cleaners on 31st July 2010 @ 10:43pm
They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.
home furniture on 1st August 2010 @ 1:25am
Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.
nyc real estate on 1st August 2010 @ 1:56am
Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.
Dyson Vacuum Cleaner on 1st August 2010 @ 6:38am
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
ugg boots on 1st August 2010 @ 9:53am
Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.
fashion games on 1st August 2010 @ 10:03am
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Electrolux Vacuum on 1st August 2010 @ 10:52pm
Finagle's Law of Dynamic Negatives: Anything that can go wrong, will -- at the worst possible moment.
nyc real estate on 1st August 2010 @ 11:04pm
It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
uggs on 2nd August 2010 @ 11:50am
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense.
batman games on 2nd August 2010 @ 2:20pm
Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe.
Dyson Vacuum Cleaners on 2nd August 2010 @ 4:01pm
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
batman games on 2nd August 2010 @ 6:28pm
Anything that can go wrong, will -- at the worst possible moment.
wedding invitation on 3rd August 2010 @ 1:46am
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
Treadmill on 3rd August 2010 @ 4:25am
Don't sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things.
nature wallpapers on 3rd August 2010 @ 4:46am
The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
3d wallpapers on 3rd August 2010 @ 6:40am
All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
animals wallpaper on 3rd August 2010 @ 10:27am
I don't care to belong to a club that accepts people like me as members.
wow wallpaper on 3rd August 2010 @ 10:42am
There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably diserable.
Alternative celebrex on 3rd August 2010 @ 12:34pm
If you're sick and tired of the politics of cynicism and polls and principles, come and join this campaign.
Celebrex on 3rd August 2010 @ 1:01pm
Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn't over until everyone gets their cookies.
Pest Control New York on 3rd August 2010 @ 3:45pm
Ah, you know the type. They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks, 'cause if they couldn't, they'd have to wake up to the fact that life's one big, scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only reason THEY can't seem to keep up is they're a bunch of misfits and losers.
forex on 3rd August 2010 @ 4:01pm
In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
Aspirin celebrex on 3rd August 2010 @ 5:58pm
I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.
forex trading on 3rd August 2010 @ 7:02pm
Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
car wallpaper on 3rd August 2010 @ 10:39pm
'Everything you say is boring and incomprehensible', she said, 'but that alone doesn't make it true.'
forex on 3rd August 2010 @ 11:56pm
Many journalists have fallen for the conspiracy theory of government. I do assure you that they would produce more accurate work if they adhered to the cock-up theory.
Treadmills on 4th August 2010 @ 12:40am
The internet is not something you just dump something on. It's not a truck. It's a series of tubes!
hq wallpapers on 4th August 2010 @ 12:50am
It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
abstract wallpapers on 4th August 2010 @ 1:54am
Throughout American history, the government has said we're in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It's a hoax.
celebrity wallpaper on 4th August 2010 @ 8:03am
Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
VigRX on 4th August 2010 @ 10:19am
After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one.
audi wallpaper on 4th August 2010 @ 6:45pm
TV is called a medium because it is neither rare nor well done.
dog wallpapers on 4th August 2010 @ 8:53pm
Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
christmas wallpaper on 4th August 2010 @ 10:33pm
Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.
celebrity wallpaper on 4th August 2010 @ 11:45pm
There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher.
dresses on 5th August 2010 @ 12:28am
If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.
Codeine on 5th August 2010 @ 1:50am
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
Propecia on 5th August 2010 @ 3:06am
If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
Codeine on 5th August 2010 @ 3:33am
The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.
nature wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 5:13am
The most overlooked advantage of owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against whacking them around a bit.
nature wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 5:13am
True. When your hammer is C++, everything begins to look like a thumb.
VigRX Plus on 5th August 2010 @ 5:21am
Throughout American history, the government has said we're in an unprecedented crisis and that we must live without civil liberties until the crisis is over. It's a hoax.
girl wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 7:00am
Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.
waterfall wallpapers on 5th August 2010 @ 9:09am
Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.
waterfall wallpapers on 5th August 2010 @ 9:09am
There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult.
Tramadol on 5th August 2010 @ 10:08am
Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
car racing games on 5th August 2010 @ 11:55am
A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar.
beach wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 11:59am
Only a free and unrestrained press can effectively expose deception in government.
rose wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 12:38pm
I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it's fantastic.
bleach wallpapers on 5th August 2010 @ 12:43pm
Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies.
nature wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 12:51pm
Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
car parking games on 5th August 2010 @ 2:06pm
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
fantasy wallpaper on 5th August 2010 @ 2:31pm
I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it shorter.
rose wallpapers on 5th August 2010 @ 3:20pm
They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.
Promethazine codeine syrup hit on 5th August 2010 @ 9:08pm
Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.
VigRX Plus on 5th August 2010 @ 9:12pm
The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?
Extenze on 5th August 2010 @ 10:54pm
If there is no Hell, a good many preachers are obtaining money under false pretences.
fantasy wallpapers on 6th August 2010 @ 12:27am
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true.
Extenze on 6th August 2010 @ 3:15am
In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
VigRX on 6th August 2010 @ 4:52am
It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant.
jigsaw puzzles on 6th August 2010 @ 6:18am
So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'
Levitra on 6th August 2010 @ 8:43am
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
Levitra commercial on 6th August 2010 @ 12:58pm
Sailors ought never to go to church. They ought to go to hell, where it is much more comfortable.
Propecia on 6th August 2010 @ 12:59pm
[War] might be avoidable were more emphasis placed on the training to social interest, less on the attainment of egotistical grandeur.
Propecia on 6th August 2010 @ 3:56pm
Never test for an error condition you don't know how to handle.
jigsaw puzzles on 6th August 2010 @ 4:21pm
If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.
NutriSystem on 6th August 2010 @ 4:49pm
Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
GenF20 on 6th August 2010 @ 5:59pm
He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
Codeine on 6th August 2010 @ 7:26pm
Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me.
car parking games on 6th August 2010 @ 8:50pm
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Tramadol on 6th August 2010 @ 11:33pm
Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.
vimax on 6th August 2010 @ 11:46pm
I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
mario games on 7th August 2010 @ 4:00am
Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research.
jigsaw puzzles on 7th August 2010 @ 8:10am
When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
Male Fertility on 7th August 2010 @ 12:52pm
The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.
Treating levitra side effects on 7th August 2010 @ 4:07pm
A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems.
puzzle games on 7th August 2010 @ 7:20pm
Science is like sex: sometimes something useful comes out, but that is not the reason we are doing it
Vimax new formula on 7th August 2010 @ 9:33pm
Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
car racing games on 7th August 2010 @ 11:05pm
They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.
easyfx on 8th August 2010 @ 1:14am
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
gfcmarkets on 8th August 2010 @ 1:59am
Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
Levitra on 8th August 2010 @ 5:36am
The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.
etoro forex on 8th August 2010 @ 1:25pm
The chain reaction of evil -- wars producing more wars -- must be broken, or we shall be plunged into the dark abyss of annihilation.
VigRX Plus on 8th August 2010 @ 1:43pm
Life would be so much easier if we could just see the source code.
Vimax removal on 8th August 2010 @ 3:11pm
Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.
parking games on 8th August 2010 @ 3:25pm
Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife.
sonic games on 8th August 2010 @ 3:46pm
Few things are harder to put up with than a good example.
rheumatoid arthritis pain on 8th August 2010 @ 4:02pm
I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Carisoprodol on 8th August 2010 @ 7:46pm
It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant.
Garden Decor on 8th August 2010 @ 8:32pm
All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than animals that know nothing.
Valium on 8th August 2010 @ 10:05pm
I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
super mario games on 8th August 2010 @ 11:11pm
I've never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I've seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.
Levitra on 8th August 2010 @ 11:15pm
It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.
VigRX Plus on 9th August 2010 @ 4:03am
A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.
Treadmill on 9th August 2010 @ 6:26am
... one of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
Fosamax on 9th August 2010 @ 7:05am
Pardon him, Theodotus; he is a barbarian, and thinks that the customs of his tribe and island are the laws of nature.
easyforex on 9th August 2010 @ 7:14am
It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
Gift Cards on 9th August 2010 @ 10:44am
Linux is like living in a teepee. No Windows, no Gates, Apache in house.
Fosamax on 9th August 2010 @ 11:54am
Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.
easy forex on 9th August 2010 @ 2:51pm
I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.
VigRX Plus on 10th August 2010 @ 12:17am
Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
100mg tramadol on 10th August 2010 @ 3:01am
Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.
Shooting Games on 10th August 2010 @ 4:33am
I have seen the future and it is just like the present, only longer.
Adidas Shoes on 10th August 2010 @ 4:34am
People who think they know everything greatly annoy those of us who do.
baby rocker on 10th August 2010 @ 5:50am
Never argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience
Treating Acne on 10th August 2010 @ 8:40am
If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
Valium on 10th August 2010 @ 9:44am
I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television.
baby products on 10th August 2010 @ 2:26pm
All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
Caterpillar Shoes on 10th August 2010 @ 5:18pm
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.
glasses on 10th August 2010 @ 5:54pm
Life would be so much easier if we could just see the source code.
Koi Fish Tattoo on 10th August 2010 @ 6:03pm
Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.
Shooting Games on 10th August 2010 @ 6:59pm
When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.
Fosamax on 10th August 2010 @ 7:25pm
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!
Shooting Games on 10th August 2010 @ 8:29pm
Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research.
baby products on 10th August 2010 @ 9:09pm
Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together.
Caterpillar Shoes on 10th August 2010 @ 10:32pm
Ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you, but when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window?
ed hardy uk on 10th August 2010 @ 10:38pm
Roses are #FF0000 Violets are #0000FF All my base are belong to you!
Sniper Games on 11th August 2010 @ 1:52am
Shield EC: new generation of antivirus. Online software stores started selling Shield EC antivirus. The new software provides efficient protection against banking trojans and viruses, including the notorious ZeuS – a thunderbolt of Internet banking all over the globe.
Shield EC is a result of two-year research and close collaboration of programmers and analysts from Martindale Enterprises LTD and Zeus Tracker, the main center for ZeuS epidemic prevention. The team of developers has received dozens of builds for comprehensive analysis, that’s why the output became a turnkey product, guaranteed to neutralize the threat, prevent data theft and money loss. Shield EC ensures the proactive protection of a PC even if the signature code hasn’t got to the antivirus databases yet.
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If you do have something to lose, install Shied EC to protect your bank accounts.
ThefeedillMix on 11th August 2010 @ 1:54am
The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
ASICS Shoes on 11th August 2010 @ 2:20am
If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.
glasses on 11th August 2010 @ 4:07am
There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can't get zillions of people to misunderstand it.
VigRX on 11th August 2010 @ 10:47am
I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need.
etoro forex on 11th August 2010 @ 11:00am
As nightfall does not come at once, neither does oppression. In both instances, there is a twilight when everything remains unchanged. And it is in such twilight that we all must be most aware of change in the air however slight lest we become unwitting victims of the darkness.
Koi Fish Tattoo on 11th August 2010 @ 2:41pm
I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.
Flash Games on 11th August 2010 @ 6:24pm
They laughed when I said I'd be a comedian. They aren't laughing now.
Gift Cards on 11th August 2010 @ 7:33pm
Shield EC: new begetting of antivirus. Online software stores started selling Shield EC antivirus. The restored software provides productive protection money against banking trojans and viruses, including the notorious ZeuS – a thunderbolt of Internet banking all over and above the globe.
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If you do be suffering with something to bow to, install Shied EC to screen your bank accounts.
ThefeedillMix on 11th August 2010 @ 8:05pm
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'
host gator on 11th August 2010 @ 11:27pm
I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.
etoro forex on 12th August 2010 @ 1:41am
It's impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
easy forex on 12th August 2010 @ 3:09am
So I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up and he said 'You've been promoted'. And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said 'You've been promoted again'. And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said 'You're managing director.' And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said 'What happened to you?' And I Said 'I careered off the road.'
Sniper Games on 12th August 2010 @ 4:23am
USA Today has come out with a new survey: Apparently three out of four people make up 75 percent of the population.
fxcm on 12th August 2010 @ 6:53am
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal.
Gift Cards on 12th August 2010 @ 10:11pm
If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track
home decor furnishings on 12th August 2010 @ 11:32pm
Go on, get out. Last words are for fools who haven't said enough.
Koi Fish Tattoo on 13th August 2010 @ 1:07am
The only one listening to both sides of an argument is the neighbor in the next apartment
fxcm on 13th August 2010 @ 2:06am
Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure.
fulltilt on 13th August 2010 @ 7:20am
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
fatcow on 13th August 2010 @ 1:03pm
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
home wall decor on 13th August 2010 @ 2:01pm
It's dangerous to underestimate the intelligence of a customer who grew a business that's successful enough to require a large and complex set of software
forex on 13th August 2010 @ 5:07pm
Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
forex trading on 13th August 2010 @ 6:23pm
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
askobid review on 13th August 2010 @ 7:21pm
First you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
fxcm on 13th August 2010 @ 8:01pm
I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means.
uggs on 13th August 2010 @ 9:19pm
A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light
fxcm on 14th August 2010 @ 1:41am
Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives.
fatcow on 14th August 2010 @ 2:08am
There is a charm about the forbidden that makes it unspeakably diserable.
Tramadol on 14th August 2010 @ 7:48am
Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie!'... 'til you can find a rock.
full tilt on 14th August 2010 @ 8:07am
I've never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a superior argument or the acquisition of new facts. But I've seen plenty of people change behavior to avoid being mocked.
ugg boots on 14th August 2010 @ 9:21am
Patriotism means to stand by the country. It does not mean to stand by the president or any other public official...
Xanax on 14th August 2010 @ 10:21am
When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.
ask o bid on 14th August 2010 @ 12:56pm
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
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Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
Hot Blondes on 14th August 2010 @ 3:36pm
I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial.
forex trading on 14th August 2010 @ 4:20pm
The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.
Hot Blondes on 14th August 2010 @ 5:26pm
We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?
Hot Blondes on 14th August 2010 @ 5:44pm
If you need more than five lines to prove something, then you are on the wrong track
EFL on 14th August 2010 @ 7:47pm
Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.
ultimatebet on 14th August 2010 @ 8:40pm
Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.
ultimatebet on 14th August 2010 @ 8:40pm
It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog.
Side effects of xanax on 14th August 2010 @ 9:25pm
A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted.
askobid on 14th August 2010 @ 11:19pm
Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
Blonde models on 14th August 2010 @ 11:40pm
I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me.
insanity dvds on 15th August 2010 @ 12:51am
Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist.
Blonde sluts on 15th August 2010 @ 3:54am
It's strange, isn't it. You stand in the middle of a library and go 'aaaaagghhhh' and everyone just stares at you. But you do the same thing on an aeroplane, and everyone joins in.
Ambian with klonopin on 15th August 2010 @ 4:05am
The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side
blue host on 15th August 2010 @ 4:42am
I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.
full tilt on 15th August 2010 @ 5:05am
You ask me if I keep a notebook to record my great ideas. I've only ever had one.
ultimate bet code on 15th August 2010 @ 5:07am
Java: the elegant simplicity of C++ and the blazing speed of Smalltalk.
forex on 15th August 2010 @ 11:51am
I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better.
Vacuum Cleaner on 15th August 2010 @ 1:00pm
I hear Glenn Hoddle has found God. That must have been one hell of a pass.
vigrx plus on 15th August 2010 @ 11:43pm
Physics is not a religion. If it were, we'd have a much easier time raising money.
Diet on 16th August 2010 @ 12:18am
I was raised in the Jewish tradition, taught never to marry a Gentile woman, shave on a Saturday night and, most especially, never to shave a Gentile woman on a Saturday night.
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Common sense is the collection of prejudices acquired by age eighteen.
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It was God who made me so beautiful. If I weren't, then I'd be a teacher.
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I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have.
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It is only those who have neither fired a shot nor heard the shrieks and groans of the wounded who cry aloud for blood... War is hell.
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Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
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I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
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Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater.
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In everyone's time, at some time, our inner foment goes out. It is then burst into flame by an contend with with another magnanimous being. We should all be indebted recompense those people who rekindle the inner spirit
Marry on 16th August 2010 @ 10:30pm
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Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
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In everyone's sustenance, at some dated, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into zeal by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful recompense those people who rekindle the inner inspiration
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In everyone's sustenance, at some pass‚, our inner throw goes out. It is then blow up into enthusiasm at near an encounter with another human being. We should all be indebted quest of those people who rekindle the inner spirit
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You'll notice that Nancy Reagan never drinks water when Ronnie speaks.
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In everyone's existence, at some pass‚, our inner throw goes out. It is then blow up into enthusiasm by an face with another hominoid being. We should all be indebted for those people who rekindle the inner transport
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If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside.
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First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
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One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.
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Military glory -- that attractive rainbow, that rises in showers of blood -- that serpent's eye, that charms to destroy...
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The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
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In everyone's sustenance, at some occasion, our inner throw goes out. It is then bust into flame beside an be faced with with another magnanimous being. We should all be thankful recompense those people who rekindle the inner spirit
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In harry's time, at some time, our inner pep goes out. It is then break asunder into flame at near an be faced with with another human being. We should all be indebted for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner spirit
Linda on 19th August 2010 @ 12:51pm
The competent programmer is fully aware of the limited size of his own skull. He therefore approaches his task with full humility, and avoids clever tricks like the plague.
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There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
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Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems.
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A state of war only serves as an excuse for domestic tyranny.
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Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest.
Prosolution on 20th August 2010 @ 12:57pm
In every tom's existence, at some time, our inner foment goes out. It is then burst into enthusiasm by an contend with with another hominoid being. We should all be indebted for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner inspiration
Linda on 20th August 2010 @ 2:47pm
Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.
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A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.
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Pascal /n./ A programming language named after a man who would turn over in his grave if he knew about it.
Nizoral on 20th August 2010 @ 5:27pm
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'
Pro Solution on 20th August 2010 @ 5:51pm
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'
Pro Solution on 20th August 2010 @ 5:52pm
Experience is what you get when you were expecting something else.
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If it wasn't for muscle spasms, I wouldn't get any exercise at all.
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He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
Prosolution on 20th August 2010 @ 9:43pm
A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation.
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In the whole world's sustenance, at some time, our inner foment goes out. It is then break asunder into enthusiasm at near an contend with with another hominoid being. We should all be glad recompense those people who rekindle the inner inspiration
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You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where she is!
fulltilt on 21st August 2010 @ 8:04am
If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.
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All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
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All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl.
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The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
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Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
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If the brain were so simple we could understand it, we would be so simple we couldn't.
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I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president.
Nizoral on 21st August 2010 @ 3:06pm
C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg.
Tramadol on 21st August 2010 @ 3:52pm
Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
Pro Solution on 21st August 2010 @ 3:58pm
UNIX is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity.
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Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing.
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I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.
Penis Patch on 21st August 2010 @ 6:47pm
Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn't mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.
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I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.
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Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street.
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Hofstadter's Law: It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter's Law.
Soma on 21st August 2010 @ 9:13pm
Object-oriented programming is an exceptionally bad idea which could only have originated in California.
ExtenZe on 21st August 2010 @ 11:52pm
Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make fun of you.
Pro Solution on 22nd August 2010 @ 1:21am
It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.
Men's Watches on 22nd August 2010 @ 2:25am
To the Honourable Member opposite I say, when he goes home tonight, may his mother run out from under the porch and bark at him
Nizoral on 22nd August 2010 @ 6:01am
How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
Lamisil on 22nd August 2010 @ 6:37am
Physics is not a religion. If it were, we'd have a much easier time raising money.
Xanax on 22nd August 2010 @ 7:06am
Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
fulltilt on 22nd August 2010 @ 7:18am
I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth.
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In harry's life, at some pass‚, our inner throw goes out. It is then burst into flame at near an be faced with with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner transport
Jane on 22nd August 2010 @ 10:58am
He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
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In the whole world's time, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then blow up into passion at near an contend with with another magnanimous being. We should all be glad for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner spirit
Linda on 22nd August 2010 @ 11:50am
Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.
Xanax on 22nd August 2010 @ 1:34pm
There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?
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First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
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The music business is a cruel and shallow money trench, a long plastic hallway where thieves and pimps run free, and good men die like dogs. There's also a negative side
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A mind all logic is like a knife all blade. It makes the hand bleed that uses it.
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You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd.
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In every tom's time, at some pass‚, our inner pep goes out. It is then break asunder into flame beside an encounter with another magnanimous being. We should all be indebted for those people who rekindle the inner transport
Linda on 22nd August 2010 @ 10:26pm
Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.
p90x on 22nd August 2010 @ 10:40pm
Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.
vimax on 22nd August 2010 @ 11:43pm
Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches.
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Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
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When I am dead, I hope it may be said: 'His sins were scarlet but his books were read.
Klonopin on 23rd August 2010 @ 1:12am
If you think it's simple, then you have misunderstood the problem.
Butalbital on 23rd August 2010 @ 1:40am
Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
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Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn't over until everyone gets their cookies.
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Incrementing C by 1 is not enough to make a good object-oriented language.
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Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
Xanax on 23rd August 2010 @ 9:49am
If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
vimax on 23rd August 2010 @ 10:21am
Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.
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'Everything you say is boring and incomprehensible', she said, 'but that alone doesn't make it true.'
Lamisil on 23rd August 2010 @ 3:14pm
In every tom's time, at some time, our inner throw goes out. It is then burst into flame at near an face with another hominoid being. We should all be indebted recompense those people who rekindle the inner inspiration
Aisha on 23rd August 2010 @ 3:40pm
I have six locks on my door, all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three of them.
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Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
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The trouble with the Internet is that it's replacing masturbation as a leisure activity.
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The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
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They have computers, and they may have other weapons of mass destruction.
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Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
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Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.
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There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.
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Why do grandparents and grandchildren get along so well? They have the same enemy -- the mother.
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The role of the president of the United States is to support the decisions that are made by the people of Israel. It is not up to us to pick and choose from among the political parties.
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Klonopin on 24th August 2010 @ 1:36pm
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The pen is mightier than the sword, and considerably easier to write with.
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Just because bulldozers are used to build highways doesn't mean bulldozers are the best way to travel on a highway.
Diflucan on 24th August 2010 @ 7:21pm
My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
Butalbital on 24th August 2010 @ 7:23pm
In everyone's time, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then blow up into zeal at hand an be faced with with another benign being. We should all be under obligation for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner transport
Aisha on 24th August 2010 @ 7:38pm
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Humor is just another defense against the universe.
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Aisha on 25th August 2010 @ 7:43am
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You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty.
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Early to rise and early to bed. Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead.
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My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher.
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Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
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The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
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Incrementing C by 1 is not enough to make a good object-oriented language.
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Humor is a rubber sword - it allows you to make a point without drawing blood.
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Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor.
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Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
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For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.
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So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me
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Not only is there no God, but you try getting a plumber at weekends.
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In harry's time, at some time, our inner throw goes out. It is then bust into zeal at near an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner inspiration
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A full page of comments and no mention of the kick ass picture! :/
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Modern capitalism is not about free markets, it is about building sufficient mass that the market gravitationally collapses around you.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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That is the saving grace of humor, if you fail no one is laughing at you.
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Finagle's Law of Dynamic Negatives: Anything that can go wrong, will -- at the worst possible moment.
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In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear.
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Ah, you know the type. They like to blame it all on the Jews or the Blacks, 'cause if they couldn't, they'd have to wake up to the fact that life's one big, scary, glorious, complex and ultimately unfathomable crapshoot -- and the only reason THEY can't seem to keep up is they're a bunch of misfits and losers.
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The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
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The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it.
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All our knowledge merely helps us to die a more painful death than animals that know nothing.
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Everybody's worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there's a really easy way: stop participating in it.
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Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
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You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax -- tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough.
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One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is 'to be prepared'.
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When did I realize I was God? Well, I was praying and I suddenly realized I was talking to myself.
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The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents.
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Nine out of ten doctors agree that one out of ten doctors is an idiot.
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The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier.
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Gravity cannot be held responsible for people falling in love.
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Heaven is an American salary, a Chinese cook, an English house, and a Japanese wife. Hell is defined as having a Chinese salary, an English cook, a Japanese house, and an American wife.
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The de facto role of the US armed forces will be to keep the world safe for our economy and open to our cultural assault.
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Where humor is concerned there are no standards - no one can say what is good or bad, although you can be sure that everyone will.
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I invented the term Object-Oriented, and I can tell you I did not have C++ in mind.
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Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
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O'Toole's Corollary of Finagle's Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.
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In everyone's sustenance, at some pass‚, our inner foment goes out. It is then blow up into flame at hand an contend with with another human being. We should all be under obligation for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner inclination
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Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.
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Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain - and most fools do.
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In the whole world's sustenance, at some time, our inner pep goes out. It is then blow up into flame at near an encounter with another human being. We should all be glad recompense those people who rekindle the inner inspiration
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When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong.
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Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake.
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You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there.
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Ah well, then I suppose I shall have to die beyond my means.
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Hofstadter's Law: It always takes longer than you expect, even when you take into account Hofstadter's Law.
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Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted.
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For if he like a madman lived, At least he like a wise one died.
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If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning.
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Politicians are like diapers. They should be changed often, and for the same reason.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
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In the whole world's time, at some occasion, our inner foment goes out. It is then burst into zeal at hand an encounter with another magnanimous being. We should all be glad quest of those people who rekindle the inner transport
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Future historians will be able to study at the Jimmy Carter Library, the Gerald Ford Library, the Ronald Reagan Library, and the Bill Clinton Adult Bookstore.
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Conservatives are not necessarily stupid, but most stupid people are conservatives
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The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
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The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible.
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Humor is the only test of gravity, and gravity of humor; for a subject which will not bear raillery is suspicious, and a jest which will not bear serious examination is false wit.
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Maybe there is no actual place called hell. Maybe hell is just having to listen to our grandparents breathe through their noses when they're eating sandwiches.
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Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
Klonopin on 28th August 2010 @ 10:02pm
Elegance is not a dispensable luxury but a factor that decides between success and failure.
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I was playing poker the other night... with Tarot cards. I got a full house and 4 people died.
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First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.
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In the whole world's existence, at some dated, our inner fire goes out. It is then break asunder into zeal at hand an contend with with another benign being. We should all be indebted for those people who rekindle the inner spirit
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Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining.
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.
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I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.
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If people can judge me on the company I keep, they would judge me with keeping really good company with Laura.
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Chaos Theory is a new theory invented by scientists panicked by the thought that the public were beginning to understand the old ones.
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Everybody's worried about stopping terrorism. Well, there's a really easy way: stop participating in it.
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Our government has kept us in a perpetual state of fear - kept us in a continuous stampede of patriotic fervor - with the cry of grave national emergency.
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I admire the Pope. I have a lot of respect for anyone who can tour without an album.
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Sex is like a Chinese dinner. It isn't over until everyone gets their cookies.
Valium on 29th August 2010 @ 6:16am
There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
Klonopin on 29th August 2010 @ 11:27am
Every nation has its war party. It is not the party of democracy. It is the party of autocracy. It seeks to dominate absolutely.
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Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working.
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Life would be so much easier if we could just see the source code.
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If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you.
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Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run.
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If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance.
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One out of every three Americans is suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of two of your best friends. If they are OK, then it must be you.
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In every tom's existence, at some pass‚, our inner pep goes out. It is then bust into enthusiasm at near an be faced with with another human being. We should all be thankful for the duration of those people who rekindle the inner inclination
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Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting.
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I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking.
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I'm trying to see things from your point of view but I can't get my head that far up my ass.
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What I am against is quotas. I am against hard quotas, quotas they basically delineate based upon whatever. However they delineate, quotas, I think, vulcanize society. So I don't know how that fits into what everybody else is saying, their relative positions, but that's my position.
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O'Toole's Corollary of Finagle's Law: The perversity of the Universe tends towards a maximum.
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There is no idea so simple and powerful that you can't get zillions of people to misunderstand it.
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I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon.
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If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
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A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light
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If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?
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I'm desperately trying to figure out why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
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The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people.
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Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it.
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You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.
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The secret of creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
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Lohr's Law: The future is merely the past with a twist and better tools.
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And the clueless shall spend their time reinventing the wheel while the elite merely use the Wordstar key mappings
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A picture is worth a thousand words (which is why it takes a thousand times longer to load...)
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Far too many development shops are run by fools who succeed despite their many failings.
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A child of five could understand this. Fetch me a child of five.
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If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough.
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As the post said, 'Only God can make a tree,' probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.
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The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?
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Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away.
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Statistics is like a bikini. What they reveal is suggestive. What they conceal is vital.
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Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.
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It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
Valium on 31st August 2010 @ 5:52am
It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts.
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Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
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In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite.
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All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
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The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready.
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A physicist is an atom's way of knowing about atoms.
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Biologically speaking, if something bites you it's more likely to be female.
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In Germany they first came for the Communists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Communist. Then they came for the Jews, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a Jew. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I didn't speak up because I wasn't a trade unionist. Then they came for the Catholics, and I didn't speak up because I was a Protestant. Then they came for me - and by that time no one was left to speak up.
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He had decided to live forever or die in the attempt.
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A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'
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God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time.
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I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
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All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher.
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How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself.
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Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
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Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
Pocket Watches on 31st August 2010 @ 8:42am
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
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Oh for pity's sake. HERE. Two pebbles. Two more pebbles. FOUR pebbles. What is WRONG with you people?
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Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it.
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Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down.
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Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it.
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Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it.
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I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right.
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He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know.
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The years of peak mental activity are undoubtedly between the ages of four and eighteen. At four we know all the questions, at eighteen all the answers.
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Humor is the great thing, the saving thing. The minute it crops up, all our irritations and resentments slip away and a sunny spirit takes their place.
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I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.
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It is practically imposible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
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He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death.
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Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
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Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact.
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Love: The warm feeling you get towards someone who meets your neurotic needs.
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Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?
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The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending, then having the two as close together as possible.
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Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure.
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Liberty and democracy become unholy when their hands are dyed red with innocent blood.
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When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.
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I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known.
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We must all hear the universal call to like your neighbor like you like to be liked yourself.
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There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem.
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Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin.
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Ketchup left overnight on dinner plates has a longer half-life than radioactive waste.
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Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.